When you dismount your horse does it give a stupendous sigh of relief? Do you have more chins than a cow has stomachs? When you take a shower can you see your feet or do you have to take someone’s word for it that your toenails need clipping? Can you crawl under a 4-wheel drive pick-up to change the oil without burning your belly on the muffler? When you look in a mirror does it say, "Objects may be larger than they appear?"

If you answered "yes" to any of these questions you’re probably in need of some form of exercise program. Luckily you have several to choose from. Unfortunately most have been designed to help you lose weight around your wallet only. There are also countless models of weight training equipment available with levers, pulleys, weights and easy financing plans. But deciding which piece of exercise equipment to buy and never use can be harder than a sit-up on a full stomach.

Farmers and ranchers should know better but their food often goes to "waist." For those well-reared individuals who don’t have the time for aerobic dancing, or the shaved legs for bicycling, I have developed some effortless exercises you can perform while working. I call my system Fitness Through Farming, a series of daily drills that will not traumatize your muscles or onlookers at a gym when they see you in a leotard.

Proper attire is important for a good cardiovascular workout. Throw away those slip on cowboy boots and start wearing lace-ups. This will insure that at least twice a day you’ll have to bend over to tie and untie the laces on your boots. Warm up properly before attempting this aggressive workout and make sure to cushion your knees.

Isometrics is a popular form of exercise where muscles are asked to push against a powerful resistance. Putting on a tight fitting pair of jeans is an example of a good isometric exercise for ranchers.

Yoga is growing by leaps and bounds because it doesn’t involve any. Yoga is all about positions, the chief one being sitting. This makes yoga ideal for tractor jockeys and cowboys. One of my favorite yoga drills is alternate nostril breathing. Switching elbows on the coffee shop counter is a variation on this theme if you have a head cold.

There is a spiritual as well as physical element to yoga that includes lengthy meditation periods where you try to remain perfectly still with your mind free from all thoughts. This is a good one to do while sitting ringside at a cow auction. Yoga also includes a lot of chanting. The idea being that the chanting mouth can’t chew.

There are little things you can do during the day that will redistribute your weight. Riding around in the pickup on a hot day with the windows rolled up and the air-conditioning off is a great way to sweat off pounds. To avoid dehydration cool down afterwards with a cold liquid refreshment of your choice.

It’s not necessary to buy exercise paraphernalia. Look around your ranch to find a piece of equipment that vibrates. Place your belly against the machinery and let it jiggle for three sets of ten minutes each. Know your physical limitations. DO NOT overtrain. Follow up by placing yourself in the prone position and rock yourself to sleep trying to get back up. When you awake stretch before rising. Feel those muscles burn?

A good dinner drill is to exercise your judgment and push yourself away from the table when you are full. Limiting yourself to one piece of dessert is known as "resistance training." In just a few short weeks you should have a better self-image even if your real one is still pudgy. Celebrate your success by treating yourself to an intimate dinner for two by yourself.