By Lee Pitts

Dear Nephew,

Rather than buy you the traditional gold pen for your college graduation, I thought I’d retrieve the one I received 25 years ago and write you a letter. I never write with the valuable pen, it just sits in its velvet lined box never getting used. In that respect it’s much of what you have just learned in school. On the occasion of your graduation I’d like to tell you some things I wish someone would have told me.

It is traditional at commencement to tell graduates that the world is a stage just waiting for their appearance. I’m sorry to inform you that the world couldn’t care less about your graduation. Tomorrow you become just another person to be taxed, harassed, worked to death, borrowed from and promised to.

There will be people who are not impressed with your fancy diploma because they don’t have one. Play it down. In your first "permanent" job you will be under-utilized and little appreciated. You boss will not be as smart or as energetic as you are, but that doesn’t mean you’ll soon take over his corner office. That’s the system. Don’t fight it...you won’t change a thing. Just remember that when you are old (in your forties) the same system will protect your job at that time in your life when you are trying to put your kids through college.

As you begin your career be advised that loyalty is more important than intelligence. At first you will not get paid what you are worth, but at the other end of your career you’ll be paid far more that you earn. Nobody owes you a job and before you quit the one you have, be sure to have some place else to go. Or, if you think it’s so easy...mind your own business. The world finds room for entrepreneurs.

Choosing a mate will be the most important decision you’ll ever make. Rather than selecting one on looks alone, you might as well pick someone that you don’t like and give them half of everything. If you want children make sure it’s not just to save the marriage. Get a dog instead. It won’t work either but at least you messed up a dog’s life and not a child’s. Don’t buy an expensive car just to distinguish yourself from people of lesser status. And remember, a car will last longer than its 48 month mortgage. Drive an older car and save the money or perhaps buy some stock in a good company. And hold on to it through good times and bad. Throw your credit cards away and never pay more for fancy labels when a cheaper brand is just as good.

Don’t worry too much about how you look. Fretting over how you arrange the hairs on your head will cause you to lose them. Your fellow employees will care far more about your punctuality than the width of the lapels on your suit.

To live a long life avoid dying. This is best accomplished by having hobbies. Rather than watching TV take long walks instead, read books, or listen to good music. Stay active playing sports instead of just watching them. If you don’t have time to mow your own lawn or clean your own house you are far too busy.

In business and in life take chances, but not short cuts. When you get lost ask directions. Keep in touch with family and don’t have too many good friends. Don’t ever buy anything over the phone from anyone you don’t know and always read the small print.

Take vacations and keep scrapbook to remind you of the good times. Smell the roses while you can. Don’t drink and drive. One incident can ruin your whole life and maybe that of another.

Don’t lose much sleep over global war or warming. Just make sure you recycle, be a good neighbor and vote. You are NOT your brother’s keeper. And just because you graduated from college don’t ever use it as an excuse to stop learning.